December 24, 2005

An Adult Christmas

I've been staying up late, meeting friends on school nights, ice skating, attending mid-week parties...all but skipped shopping this year. I wonder what other Purple WomenTM are doing for Christmas? Travelling to exotic destinations? Something a little more x-rated?

We just moved to Toronto, Ontario, Canada -- a company transfer -- all the way from San Francisco, California, U.S.A. I have not wrapped a single gift and today my husband and I are heading to the local mall, by subway of course, to buy our gifts for each other. We may take in a matinee as the few gifts that we did send this year were ordered online through our Shutterfly account!

I will miss seeing my nieces and nephews. Gosh, they will seem so much older when I next see them. I love being an Auntie. I shall write more about these pleasures in the new year. I resolve to write longer articles and attempt to publish them here and in other mainstream media. I've already written the first one about "The Question" that the childfree fear most: "Do you have kids?"

Photo: Two guys promoting Swatch Watches at the Yorkdale Mall in Toronto.

December 22, 2005

What I Want for Christmas... have one or two childfree women join the Purple WomenTM Team Blog.

Do you like to write? The subject matter is focused on all things related to childfree living. Share your reflections, a book review, your musings, a good story and your sense of humour and/or outrage on the subject.

If you are not having kids, what are you doing with all your creative engergy? Consider sharing the experience with others. If you are interested in joining our blogging team, please send an email our way.

To learn more, please visit the Purple Women website. Thank you!

December 18, 2005

Baby Not On Board

Need a Last Minute Gift Idea?
I found this book by Jennifer L. Shawne in a neat little store (there are so many unique shopping neighborhoods in Toronto!) on Queen Street West. The title really caught my eye. This is a humorous take on the childfree lifestyle. Consider it for the Purple Woman in your life (one for yourself possibly?)

In particular, I liked the quiz on whether or not you are ready announce your decision to be without child on page 12. I scored a 19:

"You're clearly ready to become an unparent. Make preparations to let everybody know. Start dropping hints, and in a couple of weeks share the big news!"

The illustrations by Anoushka Matus are precious and would make even parents LOL! The food groups pyramids were particularly amusing and I loved the novel idea to hold an unbaby shower.

Personally, I have resolved never to go to a baby shower again -- of course rules are made to be broken. I organized one for my friend in Seal Beach, Calif. before I moved to Toronto.

December 07, 2005

Book Review: Reconceiving Women: Separating Motherhood from Female Identity

Most childfree women I know cringe when I refer to us as having an alternative lifestyle. Gays and Lesbians and Transgenders seem to have the lock on this term. But the truth is that ours is an atypical adult female identity.

In Reconcieving Women; Separating Motherhood from Female Identity, Mardy S. Ireland dealves into the possibility that one can have a "healthy personality that (does) not include the role of parent." To get a feeling for how outside the mainstream our lifestyle really is, Ireland points out that all psychological theories suggest that in one way or another...

"a woman's reproductive capacity shapes her life."

A researcher and a psychoanalyst out of UC Berkeley, her book is based on a study she conducted. At the time her book was published, I had moved up to the San Francisco Bay Area. This was in the early 80s. Perhaps it was then that I set out to the library to look for a good book on the subject of childfree lifestyles and found none. Zero. This has improved much and I think there is room for more.

Ireland neatly presents the case for dividing the childfree adult women into three categories: traditional, transitional and transformational. Respectively, those who wanted children but couldn't or didn't for whatever reason, those who waited too long and experienced a healthy dose of ambivalence, and those who always knew being a mom was not for them. I think they are Purple WomenTM all!