February 08, 2008

Childfree Catholic - Revisted

I was reminded that we just may be doing something important here, by way of sharing stories, experiences, and information, when I re-read the thoughtful comments on an older post. Even though I published it months ago, it just got a new comment this week. The topic is still valid.

Here is one in particular by Coffeine that stood out for me:

"An update and shout-out to Teri and WordWench. I recently, after 29 years and my last post, parted ways with the Catholic Church, as it was getting in the way of my relationship with God.

It was the hardest thing I have ever done, but I know it was the right thing to do. The dogma, politics and female-repressiveness just became too much. Especially when, in an effort to find some sort of counsel, I approached several priests, including my parish priest, with my "childfree by choice" stance, questioning the free will and internal conscience in the eyes of the Church and God.

Apparently, in the eyes of the Church, those reasons --internal conscience, knowing yourself -- are not good enough. One priest said that he doubted the validity of my marriage in the Church, because I married knowing I might not want children and he even suggested annulment.

I had the "Be fruitful and multiply" line tossed out at me on several occasions, with no one viewing it as a possible blessing rather than a command to breed. I left the Church and its man-obsessed dogma and took God with me. I have never felt closer to the Holy Spirit and able to focus fully on God in my own way.

God and the Church are two entirely different entities from one another, moving in two different directions. In my parting ways from the Church,

I too, have just started a childfree, recovering Catholic blog, Crafting the Schism - Finding God Outside the Catholic Churchianity.

Thank you, Purple Women, for leading the charge and putting this topic up for discussion. God Bless!"

Purple WomenTM -- we learn from each other.

Read all the comments: Married Childfree Catholic. I want to thank everyone who commented on this difficult and personal topic. I very much appreciate the elevated level of the conversation on this post. Together, we have created a safe space to explore the sometimes volatile topic of being a woman and being childfree.

Flickr Photo courtesy of Nina`H (cc).
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Sara said...

The way I read it the Catholic women who want to be child-free are not complying with the set teachings of their church, but instead going off their own spiritual beliefs based off of reason and philosophy not church teachings.

That aside, I am totally child-free and not-Christian myself. And I see a lot of value in figuring out religion for yourself. If your beliefs happen to match those of an established religion great, join up, there is joy in numbers! I found one for me :) that lets me be a woman with out having children, and I think that is great.

LauraS said...

"I left the Church...and took God with me."
I read this and was reminded of what many people of faith understand at their core: God was there before there was a Church. God is us.

Anita said...

From one Christian to another...I applaud you for following the Holy Spirit. So many times...religion gets in the way of what God wants to do with our lives. God Bless you for taking the high road and realizing that God creates us all differently.

Gumby said...

This is exactly the kind of thing that has made me wary of and turned off to organized religion - particularly Christian religions.

First, it is NOT the same thing as God (or Gods, depending on your beliefs).
Second, what does that mean then for infertile people?

So, would a couple who actually wants to have babies but CAN'T because of medical issues be shunned and told they should consider annulment too because they aren't multiplying?

I thought the point of getting married was because you love someone and want to spend the rest of your life with him or her as your partner and best friend. I guess I was mistaken. Apparently it's just to find/be a dedicated incubator. Boy, do I feel stupid!