March 19, 2007

Mean People Suck, and Some Post

I read with interest the comments posted on in response to the San Francisco Chronicle article. A few people posted "who cares if these people don’t want kids?" comments, or supported the choice to remain childfree. But most posted mean-spirited comments critical of the choice or directed at Valerie and her cat.

Obviously something about this article prompted them post a comment. However, I suspect it has more to do with them than the childfree.

Scratch each comment and you’ll find an underlying emotion: fear, anger, or just plain delight at the opportunity to cough up some bitter bile that’s been accumulating in their system. To me, they sounded like a bunch of Ann Coulter wanna-bees.

Apparently, in some Republican circles, mean is cool.

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Strawberry Muffin said...

I read that thread. If you're going to discuss an article, do it intelligently instead of just calling the woman ugly and other crap like that. I think a lot of it is just envy that CF get have lives of their own while the childed are saddled with kids.

Teri said...

Yes, ladies, it can get pretty rough out there on the playground.

Ms. Muffin -- To your point about envy, this may ring true, but I don't know how many parents would openly admit it. I think that's where the "selfish" label comes from, even if it doesn't really fit. I have met a lot of childfree adults who are very supportive of the children in their lives.

We're all a part of the village and I believe all adults have a role in fostering the next generation, whether indirectly through our taxes, or directly as aunts and uncles, school teachers and the like. Maybe we lend a smile, or simply watchful eyes, it could be as teacher, librarian, or as a community volunteer, parent or no.

Elise said...

...and maybe we're the grumpy scientist who impatiently shoos kids away from his stoop...but ends up curing cancer. It's really hard to say who will contribute to society at any given time.

I think the part that's difficult about embracing diversity is that, in order to do so, one has*embrace diversity*.

We CFs are a big part of that. I think the part that makes us hard for others to "get" is that, unlike sexuality orientation or race, being CF is (generally) something that one chooses (although a lot of people seem to think that the homosexual "lifestyle" is a "choice"...but there is no arguing with such points of view).

It may take a very long time before parents realize that it's good to have us around. Yes, we'll draw down the social security system while their kids are paying into it (if it is indeed still solvent then; I'm 41 and projections suggest SocSec will be giving out at just the time I'll need it). But our taxes make their schools run (we're paying for a service we'll never use) and we're not further despoiling the world's environment and resources, leaving (as crass as it sounds) more for their kids. If they thought it through, one would guess they'd be a lot more appreciative...

IF they thought it through...(teehee)


LauraS said...

Elise--Thanks for your thought-provoking comments.
We all have different ways of contributing, or not. Maybe we'll just function as the cautionary tale, or the role model, for a future adult. Who knows?
Our mere presents suggests that parenthood is a choice for now and forever. The question remains "How is society going to deal with that fact?" If the comments are any indication, it would appear that some are not quite ready to "embrace" that reality, or us.

P.S. You're right not ot count on Social Security. It's a fiction for anyone over forty.

Robin said...

What I don't understand is why people have such issues with other people's personal decisions in life. I'm not hurting anyone, actually quite the opposite. People need to calm down and really think about where they are coming from