Reasons for being childfree
There are many reasons that the childfree choose not to have children. The reasons are as varied as the people. Here are my reasons.
1. Lack of desire - I just didn't want to have children.
2. Money (or lack of it) - we don't have the money that it takes to raise a child.
3. Time - I'm selfish with my time. I like a lot of free time. I'm an introvert, so I prefer to have my alone time to unwind.
4. Concern over the state of the world - as I look at all the pressures that kids face nowadays (drugs, sex, drinking, smoking at such young ages), I don't know how I would raise a child. I have a hard time coping sometimes with the pressures of life. I'm not sure how I would prepare a child for it.
5. My marriage - I like that we have time for each other and can do things together.
6. Freedom - we can go where and when we like without worrying about sitters and such.
What reasons do you have for your choice?
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9 comments:
1. I don't like a lot of noise all the time.
2. I like coming in and going out when I please.
3. I don't have 18+ years in my day planner to raise kids.
4. I'm currently stuck in a less-than-stellar job because of my circumstances. I would not want to have to stay in a dead end job because I had kids to look after.
5. Kids and teens annoy me easily.
6. I would not want to deal with whatever negative traits the kids inherited from their dad if I broke up with him. It would still be like having to deal with him.
1. Horrors! I can't stand babies and small children.
2. I need peace and quiet in order to re-charge. Definitely not fair to subject a growing kid to that requirement.
3. With over 6 billion people and counting, I don't think the planet is gonna miss my DNA contribution.
4. I lack patience and have no tolerance for mindless repetition...infants and small kids need vast amounts of both in order to "get" whatever they are trying to learn.
5. I can barely keep a roof over my own head, let alone someone else's.
Hmmm, where do I begin? Ok, just a few of them...
1. I don't have that overwhelming maternal feeling that seems to overcome women that have or want kids
2. I don't think I'd have the patience needed to bring up a child
3. I certainly don't have the energy needed to bring up a child. Teenagers would send me over the edge
4. Freedom - need I say more?
5. My husband and I have time for our relationship and for each other
6. I can't afford them
7. I simply don't want or need children
I saw several of my reasons in yours (freedom, lack of maternal response, time to pursue interests, 18+ years!), so I'll just add that many of my knee-jerk reactions to children and teens are , at best, not constructive, and at worst, uncaring. But worse than dealing with children everyday, I hate the thought of dealing with other parents!
Circumstance, then choice. Time waits for no woman.
The noise level really throws me sometimes. We are involved in a small group through our church that meets every other Friday night at one of the couples' home. The other couples in the group all have children and bring their kids to play in the other room while we meet. Now, in my decision not to have children, I still like kids. I just don't want my own. Yet last night at our meeting the kids were running around and playing and the noise level about put me over the edge of sanity. How do parents handle that day in and day out?
I think they become immune to it - after a while they just don't hear it any more because they live with it day in, day out.
I don't have the biological urge to have children. I had a friend one time talking about how yummy babies were and another girl talk about how she craved another baby. It's like their craving sweets! I just don't get it. I've known since I was 16 that I didn't want kids. They don't interest me. And babies bore me and require too much maintenance.
I also like having the freedom to pursue my hobbies or just to be able to travel or go to the movies on the spur of the moment. I like the peace and quiet of sitting on the couch and reading a book. I like not having to worry about the cost of raising a child or whether to keep my job or stay home.
1. My maternal instincts are satisfied by my pets (pug, and a Border collie mix)
2. I want to advance in my career and education
3. I enjoy spontaneity and travel
4. I don't want the obligation of taking a tyke to school and back, homework, etc and worry about the Playground Politics of motherhood and about which brandname stroller or whether or not I have a nanny, make organic homemade baby food or breastfeed, etc.
5. I like to follow my dreams and I have a huge list of things to accomplish.
6. I enjoy having money to save and spend. I don't need to follow the yuppie dream of Suburban Soccer Mom and don't need to buy and maintain such a large home.
7. When I feel the need to indulge in kids, I have my nephew and close friend kid's to spoil for a weekend-not on a longterm 24/7 basis.
8. I'm a feminist. I believe in the empowerment of women in this patriarchal society.
9. I love to sleep in on the weekends!!!!
10. I enjoy sex and my body, which I worked hard for.
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